dazai osamu radio show, #...4???????

[nullificates]

(you know that voice. you know it. you simply do.)

Good afternoon, Aldrip, ladies, gentlemen, everything in between, clowns, twats, twits, everyone, gather around, this is the Dazai Radio Show! As you know, blablablabla, we fought some strange things, got some gadgets, went to the desert, talked to a very handsome fairy man -- (dazai's voice becomes muffled, as he speaks into the distance,) did someone even get his number? For no particular reasons-- No? Ugh, really?! Fine, fine. Anyway, that is not what I was going to get at! Today, we have no news, but instead, let's get to our roots! This is our advice program. Need help with a girl? I'm here for you! Need help with a boy? Get better taste! Fufufufufufu!!!!!

Want to prank your idiot roommate so he can't ever reach for the sugar?! I got you! Want to build a death trap above your bed?! I got you! Ah, let's hear what the community has to say! Please, Aldrip, speak! We are all here for you!

Comments

[murderingjustice]

file complaint to the guy who didn't finish their job properly.

[nullificates]

ok done. can i come or am i unwanted

[murderingjustice]

since when has that mattered to you?

come in you freaking paradoxical asshole.

[nullificates]

god why are you so obsessed with me!!!!!

(wait, just to be an asshole, he'll answer a message--)

[murderingjustice]

i'm not
you're the one who wants to see m

[nullificates]

(okay, finally. this time, the whiskey is solely his. he enters, stretching arms and holding the bottles above his head.

he's already so damn familiar with the place.)

Hey, Aaaaaakechi-kun!!!!

[murderingjustice]

[He really is. Should He and Akira invest in a separate room just for Dazai?

Also, ugh. These bottles he keeps bringing are starting to pile up.]

Ah. Hello Dazai-san, how was your walk here?

[nullificates]

Two minutes, because I really wasn't at the top of a mountain! So much unnecessary work!

(please, understand him.)

Ask your questions to my face, that way, you can avoid being read and can ask directly.

[murderingjustice]

[Fine fine.]

Why are you with Chuuya-san?

[Not the original question but listen!! This is important]

[nullificates]

... I haven't even drank yet and you're already hitting me like this?! You're mean, so, so, so, so mean!!!

(stalling. he hates this wording akechi's given him.)

First, you need to define with. We aren't an item, if that's what you're asking, disgustingly so.

[murderingjustice]

Good. Suffer you creep.

[Now it's his turn to pull a disgusted face, as if thinking two grown men (or rather SKK) being an "item" would be gross.]

No you're not. But you're still sharing a connection. If you truly loathe him as much as you claim it makes me wonder why.

[nullificates]

Ah. So that's the issue? We loathe each other because we share a connection. I can count on him with my life at any given minute, and he does exactly what I need done - because I knew he would, and he knows I would, too. It's a stupid, disgusting, unwilling symbiosis that if either of us were to truly step away, both of us would die. It's been like this from the moment we met when we were children, down to now.

[murderingjustice]

[Okay, that makes sense. And also, kinda relatable.]

So, you wouldn't hate him if he was just another insignificant person on your way? It's the human factor that you can't stand in each other.

[nullificates]

You put it like that as if that makes sense to me perfectly! 'No Longer Human' doesn't tell you anything?! I'm bad at that part, you know! Fufufufu...!! Ah, but yes, I think I'd bully him as I bully anyone.

[murderingjustice]

Maybe. I do wonder whether you truly are as despicable as the hero of that story.

[He can see the similarities but also the cracks.]

But if your connection is rooted in mutual hatred then why take it a step above that. You could easily leave him to be as nothing but a pawn, someone to call when needed.

[nullificates]

Because you're missing an important part. I don't call. He just knows. He doesn't call. I just know. I use him as a pawn, rather often, but it can never just be that. You don't know our story, do you? At all?

[murderingjustice]

No. All I know is what you've told me here. Chuuya-san did mention you having a partnership of sorts here, but that it would be evoked once you find your way back.

[nullificates]

Oh, naturally. I left the Port Mafia years ago. We currently work together on common goals, after all.

[murderingjustice]

Hm.
So, you're together here because it's beneficial to your cause. But at the same time this place allows you to play out the cards that you've lost in your true reality. What happens here stays here, after all.

[He thinks for a brief moment.]

You say it's symbiosis but it might as well be addiction. Either way, it doesn't sound healthy. Is it truly worth the destruction it'll cause?

[nullificates]

(sorta, kinda. they truly do like each other, but are disgusted by it at the same time. a soul that has been separated, humanity a link. dazai's own lack of, and chuuya's abundance, and the paradox that their relationship is.)

I've told you, nothing really is. It is what it is. Anything I would never want to lose is always lost. It is a given that everything that is worth wanting will be lost the moment I obtain it, theeeeerefore, there’s nothing worth pursuing at the cost of prolonging a life of suffering. I don't like pain. That said, I won't remember when I return. I won't lose something I have never had, so I'll let myself see a little. Besides, I've fucked him over way too many times, and I've abandoned him too many times, too. It seems to me that my ghosting and disappearing act hardly works anymore.

[murderingjustice]

[Well.. that is a lot to take in but Dazai actually drops info that he didn't have before]

Why do you think you won't remember anything when you return? [Akira and his friends had remembered everything that went down in Maruki's reality after all.]

[nullificates]

Because I went back, and I didn't. Fy went back, and spent months, which were mere minutes to him, and he didn't remember. So, from data?

[murderingjustice]

[Right. Dazai had disappeared for a while a few months ago. Akechi remembers Chuuya's desperation.. So that where he went? How.. interesting, as far as he knew those who had been "sentenced" and disappeared for good. But that the life went on for them as if nothing had happened? Now, that does raise more questions about this place and just what is their purpose.

But that's not the topic here. Because Dazai also dropped him information that feels like a rope around his throat, slowly tightening. They won't remember a thing. It's just like with Maruki.

Akira won't be hurt by this..]

Hah. [a quiet, forced laughter.] So nothing we do here matters in the long run. Is this why you despair?

[nullificates]

To the contrary, Akechi-kun. That's why I don't despair. I've lost something important to me, as you happened to dangle in front of me before. I won't go through it if I don't remember, you see?

(does it make sense? to understand oneself through understanding others is such a trip - akechi's not dazai's problem, absolutely not. this one, he has left for fyodor, but planting a seed in the boy doesn't sound so bad either.)

[murderingjustice]

Spoken like a true coward. [if Dazai had offered him any of that whiskey he'd be making a toast right now. Stay classic, Dazai-san.]

Ah. You mean Ango-san and Oda-san? I suppose that makes sense. Considering how close you three were in my own world.