@peterparker ; video - it's gen z vlog time

[spidermenaces]

(some of us love our vlogging, our youtubeing, tik-toking-- and since here it's a known fact that peter parker happens to be spider-man, well, that means he gets to turn his tablet on while he swings through the winter wonderland that aldrip has come. whoever is watching gets a very nice view of aldrip from the tallest buildings, the snow twinkling and sparkling beneath him as he goes from building to building until he stops at the tallest one.

the camera pans and switches to his face, hair a mess of curls from all the wind that it faced and he smiles. it feels good to smile.)

So, I heard this thing, right -- this guy from the pizza shop told me, I don't know if he's lying or what, but apparently? Apparently, there's this superstition that we aren't supposed to leave our home during the solstice or something? But I'm curious - did someone go out last year? Did something happen? And if we go out... Well, actually, who's going out, first of all?

(the camera switches again, so he can film the skating ring from above-- someone just fell on their ass, and he sucks teeth because that must have hurt.)

Ooooh, ouch. Well, wear a helmet, don't get sick, invite me if you have eggnog! Friendly neighborhood Spider-man, out!

Comments

[westcoasts]

( excuse. )

you know this entire conversation is public, right?

[spidermenaces]

I wanna go on the record and say I have nothing to do with what Q just said

[westcoasts]

you did call me twice your age

( IS clint twice peter's age? he doesn't know. )

[spidermenaces]

You probably are though
I'm 18

[westcoasts]

okay, yeah, I'm twice your age.

[spidermenaces]

See

[westcoasts]

and you can avoid mentioning it again, thank you.

[spidermenaces]

You're welcome will do
Though I'm not sure Alexa is gonna
He has it out for you

[westcoasts]

...alexa?

I've worked with quentin. I know what he's like.
it's fine.

could probably even call it karma, if I'm being honest.

[spidermenaces]

You guys don't have Alexa? It's this home device
You tell it what to do and then it does it
He said he's like a radio
So
You can tell Alexa to change stations and songs
Man you don't have Alexa????????

Karma, huh?

[westcoasts]

doesn't go by that name, but we got stuff that's like it.
but for the record, there's not a single person out there who's telling quire what to do and having him do it without arguing first.

I was 19 when I joined the avengers.
I didn't take well to authority.

[querulus]

[...]

oh hey barton

[Did he assume Clint wouldn't find this because he's "old and bad at technology"? Maybe.]

[westcoasts]

you have GOT to come up with something more original than 'old man'.

[querulus]

what, you'd prefer legolas? katniss?

boring. pedestrian.

"old man" is a timeless classic. and logan has a monopoly on all the other old-related nicknames.

[spidermenaces]

Legolas 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[westcoasts]

think the point is meant to be I wouldn't prefer them.

that's because he's actually old.

[querulus]

so i'm supposed to call you "clint"?

you do realize funny nicknames are part of my brand, right?

[westcoasts]

in retrospect, I'm very unsettled by the thought of you calling me 'clint'.

"funny".

[querulus]

yeah, "funny." to me. obviously.

[...]

wait hold on how come you straight up told itsy bitsy spidey to call you clint, but for me it's "very unsettling"?

[spidermenaces]

Bruh

[querulus]

something to share with the class?

[spidermenaces]

You know you are not that much taller than me right
That haircut is just to make you look tall isn't it
You can say it
No shame, Q

[westcoasts]

because you're... you know.
you.

and because his first two options were 'mr hawkeye' and 'mr barton'.

[querulus]

i'm going to pretend that's not offensive.

so old man is preferable to mr hawkeye. good to know.

btw you're welcome

[westcoasts]

can I just clarify what I'm thanking you for? is it

1. assuming I don't make my own arrows (did you think I went to the tinkerer when I first started out?)
2. calling me fragile
3. implying I need help staying alive
4. all of the above?

( ignoring the fact that he is fragile, actually. )