001 (text, then video)

[electroburst]

we're playing two truths and a lie. if you've never played, it's a game where you say three things: two that are true, one that isn't, and everyone tries to guess which one's the lie.

if you wanna go hard mode, do it with the camera on.

[ the "camera" comes on a moment later to Reno's grinning face. ]

I'll go first!

One: I've got a license for just about anything that flies, and I'm a certified flight instructor.
Two: I've had the same job since I was twenty-two.
Three: I don't have a favorite color.

[ His poker face is immaculate; there are no tells, just his smirk and his unflinching eye contact with the camera. Good luck with your guess. ]


( this is an open post, so feel free to threadjack and play this silly game amongst yourselves. i only provide drunken party entertainment here apparently. )

Comments

[electroburst]

Nothin', it's just a game. If you wanna up the stakes, make an offer before you guess. I already know yours.

[ Tapping his temple. Danger, Will Robinson. ]

[redlines]

Is that so?

_{[ Clearly he's too deaf to hear the Kill Bill sirens going off, because boy Reno sure does have Roche's attention. Hook, line, sinker. ]}

I'll bite. If I win... I get to call in a favor. Nothing big, mind you. It'd just be if I happen to need another pair of hands. If you win... What would you want? Aside from my phone.

_{[ Hit him with your best shot, punk.}

[electroburst]

Greaaat, my least favorite thing to promise. Good thing it's not gonna happen! If I win, you're carrying me around everywhere for the next week, piggyback. I'm sick of fuckin' walking around all the time.

[ if you can't have the steed of your dreams, be the steed of your dreams. ]

That's the deal, take it or leave it.

[redlines]

Careful, Red. I might ask you to do laundry with me.

_{[ He snorts and for once he's actually not sure if he's joking himself. And hey, out of everything Reno could've gone for? He'll take it. Gladly. ]}

Bu~t, you've got yourself a deal. You wouldn't be the worst thing I've had to carry. Do I go first? Or you?

[electroburst]

You're gonna have to try harder than that to get me to handle your underwear.

[ WINK WANK WONK ]

You go first.

[redlines]

You can't fault a man for trying.

_{[ WINK WONK RIGHT BACK!!!! ]}

It's two, isn't it?

[electroburst]

[ you fuck—he gives nothing away. yet. ]

What makes you think it's that one?

[redlines]

They make you take tests to drive the toys they've got, Red. I've been riding for as long as I can remember and they still made me jump through hoops to get my license and certification for anything bigger than an ordinary car.

_{[ Driving those big trucks blows, man. ]}

Turk or no I doubt they'd take you at your word if you said "I taught myself, it's fine."

_{[ fortunateson.mp3 ]}

As for the third, I'm just guessing. That, and the hair. And the... tattoos?

_{[ God he hopes they're tattoos. Those would be some real funky birthmarks otherwise. ]}

[electroburst]

[ well, okay, fine, motormouth over here oughta know about licenses and crap, that tracks. but god dammit he's gotten everyone with the fucking color one so far. "just guessing" makes his face go completely deadpan, but after leaving him to squirm for a couple seconds, eventually he sighs. ]

Okay, yeah, fine. Two's the lie. Two's also your lie, right?

[ casually glossing over the tattoo comment. let him wonder forever. or until he can come up with his twelve millionth fake story about them, at least. ]

[redlines]

_{[ At first he starts to make a face that practically screams oof, nose wrinkled and brows pulled together. Too bad, only it shifts after a few moments into a curious arch of the brow and a shrug. Yep, busted. ]}

I only ever had the one if you can consider it mine to begin with. She's a stray that very much prefers a life of freedom, I'm afraid. Honestly it's a shame because she seems to enjoy going for rides on the bike.

_{[ Yeah. Red. You remember that ugly ass cat on his phone? That's her. ]}

A draw?

[electroburst]

[ he sure does remember. busted, bitch!! ]

Sounds like mine. Emergency Rations. Did whatever the fuck she wanted.

[ and he has no idea what happened to her after midgar got smashed... n-not that he cares about that stupid cat anyway... ;_; ]

Could play another round if you're feeling lucky. Since you're so goddamn clever, I'll have to make it harder.

[redlines]

_{[ Emergency Rations. Shiva's frigid ass how many times is this guy going to get Roche to snort? How long before it becomes oink oink boy, you mine now? ]}

I suppose I can't talk given I was partial to calling mine Miss L.

_{[ Like missile. Missile Launcher. ]}

I'm content with the two of us claiming our initial prize, but if you want to go another round then I think we can make it a little more interesting and add more stakes to the pool. It's a win-win either way.

[electroburst]

[ fair trade: Reno snorts at missile. it's not fair that they're both so fucked up like this. ]

Ohhhh no you don't. A draw means nobody wins. You want that favor, I'm gonna make you work for it.

[redlines]

So you don't want the piggyback? And here I was starting to look forward to the idea of a rare creature like yourself clinging to my shoulders. What a shame!

_{[ Roche you are playing with fire. ]}

Unless you want to add to it?

[electroburst]

I know you didn't just make a pass at me by callin' me a fucking creature. What the hell is wrong with you?

[ he says, while grinning like he appreciated it wholeheartedly (which he did) ]

Y'know, I'm starting to feel like what I put in for is too much of a reward for you, actually.

[redlines]

You Turks have access to every SOLDIER's file, don't you? You tell me.

_{[ Don't get him started because he'll never stop. Never. ]}

If you think it's going to be that then I'd suggest you make it more interesting.

[electroburst]

That's classified.

[ wink wank wonk... also he's never seen Roche's, because Roche doesn't fucking exist?! it's fine, that's also classified. ]

Fine, maybe I will. How nasty should I get? 'Cause I can get real nasty.

[ w-wink?? ]

[redlines]

_{[ wow and after he showed all his selfies and everything!! r u d e. not that one, the other one. ]}

Nasty?

_{[ Roche. Roche, quit playing with fire. Stop. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 Stamp dollars. ]}

What kind of nasty?

[electroburst]

All kinds'a nasty. Just depends on what you think you can handle.

[ this is the grin of a killer roche. DANGER WILL ROCHENSON ]

[redlines]

_{[ hoe don't do it don't you dare don't even think about it- ]}

Humor me.

_{[ dumbass. ]}

[electroburst]

You gotta carry me everywhere, and that's the only hands-on you get with me ever, but you get to keep that favor for later. Or, you win another round—no draw—and trade that favor for something a little less vague.

[ the gamble of a lifetime ]

[redlines]

Oh, that is nasty.

_{[ (softly) he'll kill him. ]}

Is that only for the week? Or is it forever-ever?

[electroburst]

Forever-ever.

[ does he have the self-control for forever-ever?

try him bitch ]

So? You wanna play, or are you gonna puss out?

[redlines]

Then... A less-vague favor.

_{[ Let's see... He could order too many hams and crank it up to eleven, but. Nah. He's got a better one. ]}

If I ever find myself in the ditch, do me a favor and pull me out of it?

_{[ On a vehicle? As a joke? In a dire situation? He'll know. ]}

[electroburst]

[ oh god, he snorts so loud and then just cackles like a wild dog. it's hideous. ]

What, rescue you? Do I look like some kinda hero to you? You're the SOLDIER here, numbnuts!

[ LIKE OK TIFA ]

When I said "less vague favor," I meant I'd blow you or something, how the fuck could you miss that? It was right there. The lowest hanging fruit imaginable.