video; un: ashiya-dono

[nuraridouman]

-ing piece of... Ah! Does this work? Helloooo? Gods, I’m going to feel like such an idiot if this doesn’t-

[The video shakes and turns several times around before it finally settles. Apparently the owner put it somewhere and is inspecting it now like one would a mirror, all angry frowns, tousled purple hair and challenging red eyes that match well with the ornate red and black kariginu that the teen(?) is wearing. And is that a paw-print on his cheek? His voice is surprisingly deep though, and comes as a belligerent growl.]

Alright. This.

[He holds up a very elegant & smug looking fox by its scruff, looking disgusted.]

This poor excuse of a pest has been having a field day eating my food, stealing and burying my clothes, tracking ink over my notices and otherwise being a nuisance. So if this is anyone’s pet, I want compensation.

If it isn’t... I’m looking for a talented fur monger or tanner to turn this into an outfit for next winter. Money won’t be an issue.

[He lowers his captive.]

Second, what’s the best way of getting from place to place here? That stupid grilled chicken Suzaku dares ignore my calls, so I need to invest in a ride that’s both reliable and worthy of an imperial court noble.

Are those Choo-Bootys really better than horse- OW! You-!!

[Rule 1 when handling wild animals: don’t take your attention off of said wild animal.]

Comments

[traumaticus]

[Oh wow. Now that is a beautiful fox.]

If you have no use for the animal allow me take it off your hands, sir.

[nuraridouman]

You are aware that that is at least a partial spirit and not some pet?

[traumaticus]

That is a fox, sir.

[nuraridouman]

With way too much spirit energy, bub. [Period appropriate language? What's that, he never heard of it. non-glitched him would be face-palming so hard at his bratty self]

Look, I'm not saying that you can't have it -- for a fair prize. But I'm not going to give you something that'll get you into trouble or even cursed just because you're underestimating what you're getting into. That's beneath me.

[traumaticus]

[Richard squints. Not quite sure if he follows what the man in the mirror (read: tablet) is saying.]

Were yo not looking for someone with skills in tanner? I am capable of skinning that creature in your hands.

[nuraridouman]

Oh! Pardon my prior attitude in that case. I was assuming that you were mistakenly looking at it as a potential pet rather than working material.

I'll make sure that it's magics won't be an issue anymore before I hand it over, of course.

[Is he going to ignore that he lost his captive just earlier and will have to catch the fox all over again? Yep, let's just sell that pelt first.]

[traumaticus]

Fox is a wildlife. Not a pet.

[Says a person who has a freaking wild boar as a pet.

But anyway, Richard frown deepens as he watches the man, contemplating on his next question.]

Are you a witch?

[nuraridouman]

They're pests.

[Douman scoffs, not at all biased because his rival is very popular with foxes -and then promptly has to stifle a laugh at the absurd question.]

A witch? Do I look like a woman to you?

I'm an Onmyoji.

[traumaticus]

They do serve their purpose as both pest and prey.

[But hey, he does take a note of the change in man's expression..]

And you say men can't be witches? [Well granted! Witchcraft was more common among women, but there were also men who practiced it.] What is an onmyoji?

[nuraridouman]

[He calms down and gives Richard a long considering look, trying to gauge how serious his question is and much details would be needed to answer.]

Not in the way the word is used in my native language. "Witches" are usually either old hags or animals who have changed themselves into seductive women in order to lure their prey more easily. Foxes, cats or snakes, for instance. They are inhuman monsters, first and foremost. Things that are better off exorcised.

Onmyoji are humans who excel in the magical arts.

Some also call us Yin-Yang Masters, or Masters of the Five Elements, since our methods center around understanding, manipulating and restoring the natural order of things. I'm going to spare you rest of the details. Let's just say that we are court officials whose duties include divination and protecting the humans from evil spirits, particularly the Emperor and the capital.

[traumaticus]

[Richard was as serious as one can get with his question and unfortunately would need as many details and explanations that one can give. He has never heard of yin-yang or five elements or whatsoever. And honestly all his medieval brain can hear is description of witchcraft....]

Why would a ruler chosen by the God need help from the magic users?

[nuraridouman]

Because that is why some humans have been given those gifts. A single human can only handle so much, especially when they need to balance it on top of ruling a whole country. But there are many kinds of evil, sometimes at several places at once.

[Douman shrugs his shoulders.]

If one of us gets corrupted, the others will notice and take care of it. But what are we going to do with a possessed emperor?